Sunday, December 27, 2009

My journal part II

It is Christmas time 2009, and I find myself living in a senior living establishment that two years ago I reviewed via the internet and determined it was too rich for my pocketbook.
Why am I here, and what transpired that made it possible for me to be here? Trying to use my carnal reasoning power, I find that it is beyond my ability to comprehend, and understand. It did not just happen, but has been orchestrated by a power becoming more familiar with each Breath I take, and as I pondered on this subject, I heard the voice of God speak to my spirit and heard in my heart many things related to the longevity of life and the business of providing for “senior” living. I observe a number of my fellow residents that suffer with disabling infirmities all needing assistance to enable them to navigate through the mysteries, both physical and spiritual encountered each day.
It is so humbling to see the glorious love of God manifested in our lives, as I observe the compassionate care afforded each resident by the staff of this establishment. They truly fulfill their Moto: “Enhancing the lives of those we serve with compassion, respect, excellence and integrity.”
As much as I would like to lay my hands on them as Jesus would, and see each of them made whole and well, I can only rejoice and praise our Lord Jesus for making all this possible. I realize His love for them is no more or less than He has ever had for each of us. He sacrificially volunteered His mortal life while nailed to a wooden cross. I am a witness, and make myself available as His co-laborer, or worker for accomplishing His will, not mine.
As for me being here, circumstances suddenly changed. The first thing was that my son retired after too many years of laboring to exist in the carnality of this world, and be able to prioritize learning the true purpose, and meaning of life. He and his lovely wife, a God given help meet, (not mate) decided to travel first before settling somewhere and at this time they know not where. The next thing, my granddaughter living in California began looking for a home for me that would provide her and others an ability to visit me more readily.
Because of changes in this world’s economic posture, and its affect on both personal and business policies, what was once impossible now is possible. The rest is history. I can now apply myself more earnestly to enhance my limited knowledge of Jesus, who over the last twenty-eight years has become my first love, and to portray the purpose and will of God to restore the lost key to the knowledge of Him. The knowledge that sets us free and the truth that divinely reveals the power of His will, “My Father’s Wondrous Love”. Experiencing all of this in my waning years, I seek no personal accolades, but seek divine discernment to rightly divide the word of truth as I ask, is this a blessing, or my presumption? I do know one thing, to Him belongs all the Glory.

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

In God I Trust

I write this to all seniors and especially those of you who have been widowed. I also offer this to the younger generation who might feel responsible for a parent or related senior citizen. Be aware, it is a traumatic experience to acknowledge you have become so dependent on others for your safety that you should not live alone. Also, put credence in what you have been taught, that is Jesus is real and He will never leave you, trust Him. It is written “My sheep hear my voice”, and since He sent us “A comforter”, you should ask and listen.
It was June 2007 the first anniversary of what I thought was the beginnings of the end of my happiness. It was the culmination of events that led to the loss of my beautiful wife Phyllis. Widowed again, the third time, it seems almost unreal the speed at which my life changed. Phyllis and I, living in mobile home park in the high desert of southern California were happy as we battled the adversities of everyday life while we talked about, and thought about our future. It happened on July 2, 2006 she went to be with the Lord, and I awoke the next morning alone again. She had been my eyes as well as my protective and loving wife as I was experiencing dimming of sight from what the doctors call macular degeneration along with a cardiovascular problem. Listening to my doctors and immediate family, and although I never had given thought of spending my waning years in, of all places the south.
After much prayer and meditation I answered the invitation from my son and daughter-in-law to let them move me to live with them in Alabama. I did and they so graciously made room for me in their home, and I moved four months after the death of my Phyllis. It took me about three months to realize the impact my living with them would have on their beautiful relationship. I let my fingers walk through the yellow pages of their phone book and found an establishment offering affordable senior and assisted living within twenty miles of their home. Again, depending on God to guide my steps, I moved into that establishment on the tenth day of February 2007. My thought process went wild. What happened? Why am I still alive, and what am I doing in Alabama living among total strangers? I even had difficulty understanding their peculiar structure of the English language. Yet, I soon understood they were all there for the same reason I was. They all needed some level of care or assistance. I soon realized I was among friends and I learned to love each of them and to pray with and for them. This all had a positive effect on my attitude toward life while in this carnal world and body.
Having zero ambitions for personal gain or for any self satisfying pleasures, I resigned all by relinquishing selfness including my arrogance, self exaltation and any egoism to my Lord Jesus and to trust Him implicitly. In actuality I have never had a more positive attitude concerning life. I realized that I had to let go of all my past, and not drag it all behind me but look diligently to the predicted and promised future. I still have wonderful memories, and will always cherish them. Strangely, I began comprehending the true meaning in God’s sovereign plan and purpose for my living. I was now afforded time to prioritize God. This meant to seek the Excellency of the knowledge of Him and my Lord Jesus. Having revealed to me, and given me possession of the priceless privilege of knowing His unwavering truth. As it is written, (Luke 11:52) by man’s legalism and adopted political philosophy, we have lost, or had stolen the key to this knowledge for generations. It was not coincidence that brought me to this place, but by the influence of God’s Holy Spirit that knew exactly what He was doing. He first led me to many places in his intimate and loving letter, the Holy Bible, where I now realize is in total one integrated message from my heavenly daddy. Throughout its entirety I first apprehended then comprehended with understanding His message. He assured me I had a mission and a purpose as His co-worker for which He would form me and lead me by His hand to be His servant and witness. I was then influenced to write a poem and I did five months after moving into that facility. I had it published in my book titled< “My Life in Poetry”, and is as follows.
After writing about everyone else I decided to write something about me.
At a very young age my mother taught me of a Jesus who would, if I asked him, supply all my needs.
By so doing she planted a seed of faith, then she said he would do more; he would my every hunger feed.
I was told he was Almighty and spiritual but where might I find him? I thought, with such a God I would really like to develop a personal and intimate amity
During my adolescent years I tried finding him going from church to church but I gave up after finding no one matching his identity.
I tried to read mom's book, the Bible it availed nothing, for all the 'thou's, and thee's and begat's I did not understand, so I gave up trying.
This Jesus remained a mystery to me for over half my life, yet I now recognize his closeness to me was, and is still faithfully untiring.
For some reason my prayers were awesomely answered even though having a lack of knowledge I was living in Adamic sin.
I had to lose the subject of my adoration, selfness, before my Shepherd could find and redeem me, and when He did I surrendered all to Him.
It took fifty-three years after first learning about him before the shades began to fall away from my eyes.
By revelation knowledge I become conscious of the devious consequences for accepting Satan's lies.
God's truths have always been visible before, but have been cleverly concealed.
As an everlasting monolithic fellowship with Him developed, they are being liberally revealed.
Receiving and accepting His promise of living eternally with Him is an experience of a monumental kind,
It is a continuous phenomena and a mystery as through His Holy Spirit He progressively renews my mind.
I humbly give thanks to my Almighty Aba Father, in your name Jesus, for your never failing faithfulness.
For in all my years you never left me nor forsook me and I now recognize the magnitude of my blessedness.
You have awesomely manifested yourself to me and I find that I'm fraught with the desire to understand the inadequacy of man.
I dedicate the rest of my life to magnify God's Glory by being obedient to your word; I know that with "The" blessing I can.
Unconsciously hidden from man's earthly intellect is the truth of your majestic power that works supernaturally.
We hold the 'rod of Moses' to use in obedience to your command so your Holy Spirit will performs your promised works miraculously.
Unexpectedly I find myself living in a home among strangers, all needing assistance; all are struggling against some handicap and have only memories of limited worldly felicity.
In accordance with your word and by your anointed authority, I am moved to release the awesome power of the faith provided each of us to overcome our personal frailty.
The challenges before me I confess are intimidating, but I fear not and vow to you O! God, I will
By submission be the point for the release of your power thus you, your purposeful loving mercies fulfill.

It is now December, 2009, and after three years and three months living in Alabama, I find myself back living in California. By the wondrous love I heard in my heart His voice confirming it was His desire that I return to from whence I came. I was able, with the loving Grace of God and help of a granddaughter; transfer my residence within the corporate identity for senior living. At this time I know only one thing. Jesus and God are real. Jesus born of a virgin, voluntarily submitted his mortal body as a sacrifice by allowing Himself to be crucified, transformed into sin, carried it all to the depths of hell to dump it all in the lap of Satan and take from him what he had stolen, thus redeeming with the priceless value of His blood all sin in the world from which includes death and cursing, thus making available to all mankind the blessing of Abraham. He then was raised from the grave and commissioned believing man with all authority over the now powerless sin when becoming victors by the oneness with Him. (Born again)

This posting will be continued.